I have a lot of friends that damn near never cook for themselves with the exception of frozen pizzas and maybe a PB&J. The thing is, there are tons of short cuts out there, making cooking pretty damn effortless. McCormick recently came out with these "Recipe Inspirations" to help out those of us that can be a bit clueless. So, if your kitchen is that funny little useless room that only gets dirty when bedroom humping gets boring, this blog's for you!
As you can see, I decided to try out the Chicken Marsala pack. The instructions on the back were straightforward and easy to follow.
I started by turning on some funky music. ( La Roux, I'm Not Your Toy ) then cut up the chicken into "bite size" pieces. I buy my chicken from Costco and I normally choose "tenders". Tenders are just boneless, skinless breasts that have been cut into strips and are ( for some reason ) cheaper than whole breasts. ( Who's giggling because I said breast? Come on now, I know how immature my friends are! Own up to it! ) Anyway, having the chicken already partially cut up makes this process a little easier. Also, just a friendly tip, kitchen scissors work great for this. Here's a visual on my version of "bite size". Although, I suppose anything that can fit into your pie hole can be considered "bite size".
Has any noticed that the McCormick directions don't say to cut it up this way? If you didn't you fail. Pay better attention. For those of you who did and are questioning if I know what the hell I'm doing, you fail as well. No, I have no idea what I'm doing but you didn't have to eat it, so what do you care? Here's another little tip...smaller shit cooks faster. You're going to have to cut it eventually to cram it down your gullet, might as well be now.
Next, coat the chicken in the flour/seasoning mix. If your lost, check out #1 on the second picture. MAKE SURE you remove excess flour unless you like eating glue! Simply toss a few coated chunks from one hand to the other. Like playing chicken catch with yourself. If you know how to juggle this could be more entertaining.
Oh, shit. I forgot to mention that you should get the butter and oil on the heat. So, ya...do that now. Once the butter is melted and sizzling hot, dump the chicken in there. Directions say to cook the chicken in batches. I say, WTF? Use a bigger pan if it's an issue. It also says to remove the chicken when it's cooked and then add the mushrooms. Will Smith says, "get jiggy with it and throw everything in at once, G!" Direct quote.
The mushrooms only need to cook for 3-5 minutes on medium heat. By the way, if you are unsure what medium heat is just place your little knob, turny, thingy exactly half way between off and it's highest setting. For me this was at 5. While things are cooking away Big Willie Style prepare the sauce. In other words, pray that your lush self didn't drink up all the wine.
If you have enough wine, and are not stupid drunk at this point, continue. If you are out of wine, are stumbling drunk, and or on the verge of passing out, turn all heat sources off and order a pizza. For those of you that were able to continue, bring the sauce to a boil in the same pan as the chicken and mushrooms. Make sure you cook out all the alcohol. I dropped the heat and let it simmer for about 5 minutes after it reached a boil. Final step is to add the parsley, however I added about 2 tablespoons of heavy cream as well. I don't really know why, I just felt adventurous.
Viola! You're done. Make a few simple sides and you're meal is complete. I decided on Crescent rolls, jellied cranberry sauce and steamed asparagus.
Ratings - ( a possibility of 5 ☆'s )
Cost - ☆☆☆☆ The McCormick pack was less than 2 dollars. Store brand chicken broth can be in the dollar range. In a perfect world you should have Marsala wine on hand at all times. However, if you have to purchase it for this recipe you'll have plenty left over to make it a good four or five more times.
Difficulty - ☆☆☆ I tend to over cook chicken so I may be a bit bias, other then that it was really straightforward. I'm thinking the recipe could be adapted fairly easily with precooked chicken.
Taste - ☆☆☆ I'm not a big mushroom fan and I think the flour coating got a little gluey.
Clean up - ☆☆☆☆ One cutting board, one bowl, one pan, knife, measuring spoon, measuring cup, whisk, stirring spoon. ( Everything went into the dishwasher )
Last but not least, I called this Cheaters Chicken Marsala since I used the McCormick Pack. If you read this hoping to make a meal for a cheating lover my apologizes. Make Chicken as directed, before it hits the cheaters bowels cover the toilet paper in itching powder. Enjoy their pain.
Happy Porking People!
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